Miss Universe no Misses Universes

In case you missed it, the wrong woman was crowned Miss Universe last night. With the choice narrowed down to Miss Colombia and Miss Philippines, the always affable comedian Steve Harvey mistakenly announced Colombia had won. As is customary at these events, lovely Ariadna Gutierrez burst into tears while last year’s champion Paulina Vega – also from Colombia – coronated her.

While Harvey quietly exited the stage, the statuesque senorita, who closely resembles a younger less curvaceous Sophia Vergara, blew kisses to the audience and the other contestants. A few moments later though the follically challenged host returned sheepishly to announce he had misread the cue cards.  In fact, Gutierrez was only first runner-up.

On cue, Miss USA who was standing next to Miss Philippines smiled and hugged the real winner Pia Alonzo Wurtzbach and escorted her to the front of the stage where she and Gutierrez stood awkwardly side-by-side for a moment. The most dramatic moment then occurred when Vega removed the tiara from the understandably devastated Ariadna to place it on Pia’s head.

As mortifyingly wonderful television, the pageant’s culmination was unbeatable. But it left me unsatisfied.  Not being a beauty contest aficionado, I saw none of the event live.  I only tuned in after the fact via youtube to observe the train wreck.  Accordingly, I have no opinion as to whether La Philippines was truly more deserving.

What I can say is that both ladies are stunning and looked fantastic in the gowns they were wearing when each was champion seriatim.  Gutierrez showed great class after the event telling Fox she was happy finishing second.  Nevertheless, in light of the cruelty of losing one’s realm within minutes of what appeared to be an orderly ascension to the throne, a much better solution would have been a joint reign.

The ladies could serve ably as co-queens.  The universe is unfathomably large.  There’s more than enough for the two beauties to share.

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